You ever get that funny feeling….

Do you ever get that funny feeling somewhere in back of your mind that something just isn’t right? Well, seems to be a common theme in my life lately. Either I experience a strange coincidence or a passing comment is made that forces me to think, “Hmmm, something is definitely out of place here.”

(Start humming the tune for the theme song “Which one of these is not like the Other” here.)

 

It’s an everyday occurrence for me, spanning a wide variety of subjects. When I am in a conversation, my mind races to make a connection from the present subject to a previous thought or memory, infinitely linking the two together. The result is me ending up miles away in my own head, half-way enguaged the the conversation. Is this how I learn, how I remember things? By linking them to previous events or memories? Hmm, seems a little backwards to me. Am I just thinking too much about thinking? Is this the definition of adult ADD?

 

I remember seeing a commercial for ADD a long time ago. It was described as something along the lines of the brain portrayed as a television where the channels are constantly changing, random images are shown for a brief second, then another, and another. This kinda hit home for me. I thought, you know what, that does happen to me frequently. Every time I tried to explain it to someone, I can never quite get the right message through. Then again, how could I without the person getting inside my head? Believe me, I am in it enough, it isn’t the greatest place on earth.

 

A deadly combination, ADD and a very very vivid imagination. I wonder if one feeds off the other; considering if the ADD is always changing the channel, then your imagination grabs onto one of those threads and runs with it, making it harder and harder to get back to the center. So you end up taking an alternate route, leading you a bit closer to the center, but you are still not quite there, and now stuck on an alternate path.

 

This is how I picture that train of thought:

 

I guess in a way I am thankful for this mentality, even if I have no control over it.  I’d rather be thinking too much rather than too little. Now if only I can train myself to get into that ‘hyperfocus’ state, life would be much easier.  I’ll keep working on it.

Whenever someone says that they are thinking of nothing, I find that impossible to believe.  How can you be thinking of nothing?  Nothing at all?  I don’t get it.  When I am in a quiet moment and someone asks me what I am thinking about, it evokes a lengthy and disjointed explanation.  I get so far along those ribbons on the maypole that I forgot which thought makes up the pole. Hmmm. Chew on that, it’s delicious.